South Haven, Mich.—At breakfast this morning in Captain Nemo’s restaurant, I overheard the talk of two men, one of whom had already distinguished himself by saying, “You can use every bit of a hog but the squeal.” In fact, he did most of the talking. But late in the session, the other one listed his pet peeves:
- Socks with open-toe sandals
- Low-powered motor scooters on the highway
- Motorcycles towing trailers (“If you need that much shit, get a convertible.”)
Then he told of the ultimate. He had seen a low-powered motor scooter going 30 mph on the highway, towing a trailer, and the rider wore sandals and socks.
The every-bit-of-the-hog-but-the-squeal man said, “Did you hit him?”
Maybe time to check some cold case files?